Jake Yarris
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The paramita I have been resonating with recently is “exertion”. I have been having a lot of experiences with the buddhist nature of exertion and it was invigorating to (re)learn the paramitas and remember that exertion is a transcendent action. It has been very prescient to me in recent years the concept of realizing an energy within yourself, and realizing a capacity to keep on giving especially. That you actually do have so much to give. At times voices of your mind might tell you negative things: that you are “too tired” for something, that you can’t afford to help another, that you need to give up on a project or an effort. Of course, it is important to protect and support yourself above all else. But often you actually do find in your heart an almost boundless exertion, an ability to give to others or to continue on. And if it is present in your heart, you may be astounded how far your body and mind can go. Whether, for me, that be in an intense physical effort, helping others at work, or simply small kindness actions when you already feel tired or low yourself.
I am reminded of a quote from a show I have watched with close friends: “Set your heart ablaze!” If I breathe for a moment and look within, during a difficult effort, I may find that in fact my heart is ablaze, and has been the whole time. That each of us may in fact possess a tremendous inner strength, inner pool of energy and compassion, for that has indeed been our nature all along.To be honest, at this time I don’t really have a “large concern” in my life. However, I think that based on my internal patterns of personality and conflicts, the main “large concern” that I feel may arise has to do with being concerned for what I will decide to do with my future: will I find a path that is fulfilling? Will I be making enough good in the world? Will I be “successful” or will I be “wasting my time”? At times I feel conflicting forces of wanting to be traditionally successful and stable while also contending with the intensely creative and imaginative forces that are inherent within me. With the desire to give my creativity as much of my time as possible, despite a perceived lack of material gain or “success” from that time usage.
I think the truths can be very helpful in this regard. You could take many angles. You could say that grasping to some concept of “success” is not actually real, and causing suffering. You could say that grasping to my identity as being “creative (wasting time)” or “smart and successful (avoiding what calls me)” are both ideas that can cause me suffering by the grasping of them. You could say that indulging in these mental conflicts and fueling their spiral is also a vector of pulling me away from reality, causing suffering. You can look at the eightfold path, and see that actually, if I am dedicated to these goals, the “right” path will arise organically. If I am following positive karma in my actions and decisions, then benefit will arise as a result. It is possible to both 1) invest in my own creativity and 2) work to make money to support myself WITH right view, action, intention, concentration.
And in terms of worrying how I spend my time: right livelihood outlines a pretty simple definition. Making money or acquiring “success” is nowhere within those eight folds. To work with our mind, to plant seeds of compassion and benefit, all one step at a time: the teachings say, if these are our goals, the diminishment of suffering will simply arise as a result of our work.I find it so interesting and synchronous that our first essay prompt is about our lineage, as I have recently found myself deeply reflecting on the mentors on my life who have been so impactful in my growth and learning–those special members of our growth who attract us and add a few bricks from their path to ours. Recently, I had the opportunity to see my guitar mentor of basically my entire childhood play music in a small home concert after not seeing her for five years. The reconnection gave me so much raw joy and I remembered how much I aspire to be a person and artist like her, while still becoming my own self. Slowly laying my own path with bricks I’ve made, found, or been given by people like her along the way.
I love the realization that we all are here because of others, because of a lineage. Another mentor of mine used to end many lessons by saying “you are here because somebody loved you”. What a beautiful sentiment. To remind ourselves as much as possible, that we are all here because actually a lot of people have loved us, in each their own way, for truly to teach is to love, to encourage and guide is to love.Hello, my name is Jake. I’m 22 years old, I grew up in Portland OR and currently live in Goleta California.
I have always been a seeker. At 15 I first experienced a consistent meditation practice and it was difficult but very impactful. I have been inspired by many different paths and voices along the way and often found the most resonant truths to be more shared than individual. Through meeting and taking classes with Susan I started into Tibetan Buddhism, and felt that many things just made sense: that these were teachings I had heard in my heart and mind since being a child and now, here they were externalized.
I took refuge in 2023.
I am so grateful for the strength and selflessness offered by our teacher Susan Piver, I know she has helped so many. Happy to share these teachings and experiences with you all!
Also, I am a four! for those who have enjoyed some study of the enneagram.