Elizabeth Watts
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Hi Rosie, Thanks for sharing your uncertainty about the meditation instruction last week. I can certainly relate to realizing I left things out as well. I agree that practice will make it easier. My partner and I did take a moment to give each other feedback, so maybe you can add that in next time. It was really helpful.
Hi Mary,
It is easy to get lost in our heads while giving the instruction. I can certainly understand the difficulty of switching from hearing the instructions to giving them. I like the tree imagery too, and I’m sure that was helpful to your partner. I think we have to give ourselves a lot of space at this point. Practice will certainly make this process easier. Thanks for sharing!I enjoyed sharing meditation instruction last Saturday. It felt natural to extend the kindness I find in my self-instruction to my partner, and she was open and receptive. I did not feel nervous, so I volunteered to go first. I enjoyed sharing my own personal method, staying within the simple instructions.
We had a few moments of sharing feedback after each of us gave the instructions, and that was constructive. She noted that she felt grounded. We had decided to both leave our audio on while we practiced together, and I felt this was an important part of feeling connected during our practice.
I realized as I was receiving the instructions that I had skimmed over a couple of areas where I could have elaborated more, and that was interesting to see. My mind wanted to dwell on the perceived failings of my “performance,” so I gently brought myself back to the present moment. It was easy to reconnect to the practice once I let that go.
I think this is going to be helpful for any future students, because I can see how easily I go into thinking, even when I am focusing on another person. I can be prepared to drop the story line and just move back into noticing my breath and the other person.
Hi Andrew, Thanks for sharing your lineage. What an interesting link between racial justice, your Christian heritage, and the Buddhist path.
Hi Sandi, what a beautiful musing on your experience with lineage through your family and community. I love the idea that your rich heritage ripened you for the Buddhist teachings you were to find later in life. I also appreciate your reflection on the qualities that your young life instilled in you, just by being brought up in that world.
Hi Dejuan, I enjoyed reading your reflection on lineage, particularly how you personalized it by thinking of the individuals who helped pass along the traditions. I had not thought of it in quite that way, all the people who carried the teachings to us through the years. How magical.
I also thought of my ancestors when considering my lineage. The story of your grandfather is striking. How he had the fortitude at such a young age to strike out truly on this own. Your family has a rich heritage in his courage.
I think this musing really taps into the gratitude you have for all of the streams that have brought you to where you are on your path. Thanks for sharing.
It’s fun to think of the lineage streams that have been important in my life.
The first one that comes to mind is the lineage of my Grandmothers. They were women of strong faith and believed in the power of prayer. In my own way, I continue that lineage by calling on their strength when I need it in my life. My form of prayer might be different from theirs, but I feel linked to them through my own practices.
I also have a strong connection to Yoga, having practiced it since I was in my early 20s. I have studied the various deities and connect with their strengths. I love the forms of Kirtan and Asana for connecting with that deeper sense of magic in the world.
I came to Tibetan Buddhism in my 30’s and definitely feel strongly connected to that lineage. In particular, Pema Chödrön has been a guiding light and teacher for many years. Her picture is on my shrine. I love how Susan said that it is not really about the person in the photo, but rather the teachers and the lineage, all the way back to the historical Buddha. I have attended a Pema study group for over 10 years with fellow students (the Pema Tigers) who have been on the same path. I feel a love and devotion to her as my teacher, but I believe that connection goes much deeper than just to a person whom I have never met. There must be something else going on here, wherein I am linked to the teachers and teachings who have come before her. Pretty cool.
Hi Alexandra,
I enjoyed hearing your perspective, as my own childhood was very religious. I appreciate your observations that the concepts of God and religion are used by many people not only to harm others but to give glory and praise when things go well. I also agree that numbness comes close to the feeling of nihilism. That seems like a very sad place to live. Beliefs as obstacles. How true.Hi Susan, I definitively relate to what you experienced of grace and compassion, even company within your childhood religious figures. That love and compassion can be quite confusing standing alongside the Hell teachings I received as well. I appreciate the words you found to express the hopefulness you find in Buddhism, as well as the one universal energy you have discovered in the human condition. Thanks for sharing.
Like many of us, my first experience with eternalism came in the form of organized religion. I grew up in a very strict Southern Baptist household. We not only attended church several times a week, we also went to the church school, where my parents were teachers for a short while. Needless to say it was a complete immersion experience. I had no other reality than the concepts of God and Heaven in the next life and Jesus as a personal friend and guide in this life. Absolute acceptance of the rules set out by the church was all I knew. All was well with this insular world view until I reached puberty.
Despite our deep involvement with the church, I had a rocky home life, in which I experienced the hypocrisy of harmful words and actions that were and not representative of the expressed beliefs. I remember very clearly the year I was 13 when I literally lost my religion. I was deeply involvement with my church youth group (a different, slightly more liberal Southern Baptist community), and I still espoused the accepted beliefs. But all of a sudden, I lost my connection to these beliefs and the personal relationship I always felt I had with God/Jesus. I remember laying awake at night wondering where it all went, feeling the loss of connection to something beyond myself.
That experience with nihilism was extremely painful to a sensitive, imaginative young person. It harkened back to a time in my childhood when I was outside looking up at the stars on a particularly dark and clear night when the milky way was visible in all it’s billion-starred glory. I suddenly felt like I was being sucked up into the universe with no reference point at all, just going on and on. It was very unsettling. Likewise those days of angst and disconnection in my 13th year were very lonely times. It was isolating as well, as I felt guilty and embarrassed and so kept it all to myself.
What brought me out of that time of disconnection was a powerful spiritual experience. I was invited to an Episcopal camp the following summer with my best friend. It was a fun weekend of singing camp songs, making crafts and going to services. The small, rustic chapel was steeped in ritual with incense and candle light. There was a statue of Jesus that seemed to be alive and emanating love and acceptance.
On the last night, they had a very sacred ceremony in the little chapel. In the flickering candle light, I felt a sudden reconnection to the part of myself that I had lost. I now see that experience as the magic of opening up to the present moment in a way I never had before. It gave me a glimpse into something ephemeral that was alive, instead the rote dogma I had lived by in my childhood. Perhaps it was a spontaneous experience of the Middle Way. This feeling of connection lasted for several months, and I believe it cured me of nihilism for life.
Though I don’t Practice any religion now, I feel that time of breakthrough was important in healing my fractured sense of self, and it helped to usher in an adult life that is curious, open and respectful of other realities and realms.
Hi Allison,
I love your direct and to the point answer here. You really put it in a nutshell. I agree that the best teachers don’t provide answers per se, but provide that roadmap for our own discovery.Supporting discovery in another person starts with my willingness to discover things within myself. Why am I on this meditation path? What do I hope to get out of it? Why do I keep at it? What happens when I create the space to keep coming back to the technique again and again?
The next step is to be open. Open to the answers that come from within me, and open to another person’s process. Deep listening is a tool that is imperative. Active listening to what they are saying, instead of being caught up in my thoughts while they are speaking. That is the way to help listen them into their own wisdom.
I love that Susan said we are not here to teach anyone anything, but to help them discover something. That really takes the pressure off. I don’t have to have all the answers. I love the idea of bringing my own experience with meditation into the conversation, because for sure I have experienced many of the same things others have around meditation. That common ground could be a way in to collaboration with another person’s wisdom instead of just teaching the meditation practice. Discovering what we have in common can be a bridge to the thread that connects us all together. Being open to what I may learn from them is a bonus.
And then there’s the simple container of the technique. Body and breath awareness, noticing when we get swept away in thought, then let go, come back, begin again. Again. And again. Simple, trustworthy, effective.
Hi Kat, thank you for your thoughtful reply. Since you have been in a teaching role before, you bring a unique perspective based on your experience. Each of your points is very important in the role of guide. I would add, and it is inherent in each of your points, patience to the mix. It would be an easy to breeze by the needs others may not be forthright in communicating with us or rush their observations or self-discovery. I’ll be working on that myself for sure! Looking forward to being in class with you.
