Ana B Ruiz
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Rosie, I like the way you put it – readiness is being willing, even though we may not feel ready. Sorry if I’m paraphrasing, this was my take away! Thank you for helping me see it that way:-)
Over the last few weeks my confidence and comfort offering instruction have increased. I think back of Susan’s words “how can you do it right, how can you do it wrong?”, just like the dharma, it feels expansive… I think I feel permission to just do it my way and not feel the constraints of a narrow definition. Not narrow, but still precise. How much freedom there is in that! I hope I’m making sense – but yes, I do feel ready and eager to offer instruction to others. And to hone my style, to change and evolve as I learn and practice over the years. I’m excited for the topics we’ll be covering the next two classes – bringing our practice outwards. I’m also looking forward to staying connected with this amazing cohort of aspiring instructors, in whatever capacity we bring these teachings to life.
Your description of this life changing retreat is beautiful. Watching the sunrise with your retreat-mates sounds really special. I attended a retreat at Drala and this brought me right back there. I also had the fortune of having Gaylon Ferguson as my first meditation teacher at the Boulder Shambhala Center in 2014 or so. It was wonderful experience!
Hi Ankur, thank you for pointing out that difference! You’re right, as teachers we can’t control the motivations of the students, and our responsibility is different from that of a “household host”.
Colin, so much love flows out of dad’s teachings and what you made of them, it’s really moving. Thank you for sharing this very special gift with us.
Cheryl, thank you for sharing such rich memories and experiences. I think your observation “My mom knew how to make things relatable” sums up what it is to be a great teacher. Thank you for sharing your this story with us.
Hi Elizabeth, I agree class size matters. That’s something I didn’t think about, but it makes a big difference. I tend to think more about the physical environment. And duration and movement are also key factors. I’d love to run workshops some day and I’d love to be one of those teachers that can make it an enjoyable experience to everyone, as much as possible. Thanks for sharing!
Hi MaryBeth, I can so relate to an ugly (what felt like to me from your description) and unkempt room can make all the difference. For me that’s key. It also shows the value that an organization puts on learning, in my very opinionated opinion :-). Thank you for the book recommendation and for your sense of humor.
An ideal learning environment for me is one that feels I can relax in. Tidy, inviting, luminous (preferably). And where the host tried to anticipate some basic needs – water, comfortable sitting, maybe some writing supplies, and even better if there are some “unexpected or non-critical” items, like flowers… Aside from the physical aspects, it needs to be safe for questions and feel inclusive. The teacher should be prepared and be intentional, and be ready to actively moderate the group if the need arises (making sure everyone has an equal chance to comment, for example). As I write this, it feels like I’m being “demanding”, but on second thought, these are just basic behaviours that show respect for those who are spending time with us. I think there is some overlap between creating a good learning environment and being hospitable hosts, something that can get forgotten in our busy lives.
A non-ideal environment is probably just the opposite of everything I mentioned above, but by far the thing that I find the most distracting is a teacher who is not prepared. I want to leave a class feeling like my time was worthwhile and respected. Aside from that, I can adapt pretty well to different styles, but I want to leave the time together feeling like something in me, even if the tiniest piece of understanding or awareness, shifted a little. I think (again, going back to the very beginning of the Forum questions) a teacher’s Presence can do that. All the rest – the water, the flowers – maybe are just a way to calm our nervous system and make both students (and teacher) know that we are serious about the work, kind to each other, and ready to embark on something special together.
Jo, it’s interesting to learn more about a setting where the teacher has many students – and all the dynamics that can bring. I’ve never taught to many people at once, so I tend to think of the student-teacher relationship as one-on-one. What came to mind as I read your response is that things will invariably land differently for different people, and even the best intentions can be received in ways we can’t control.
THanks for sharing about your experience!
A few months ago I was very excited to finally start therapy, something that I had been wanting to do for a while. A friend connected me to a friend of hers, and this person eventually to one of her colleagues. I was looking forward to talking to a professional, but unfortunately this relationship didn’t last long. We met virtually a handful of times and communicated over text messages in between sessions to arrange meeting times and other logistics. During these communications she always felt unnecessarily distant. While this was not the deal breaker, feeling that distance did put me off. It seemed to me as if she didn’t trust herself to have a more natural communication – or at least one that matched how she approached the sessions. This is, of course, my very subjective opinion, but I did experience it as an obstacle.
I’m all for clear and strong boundaries and, as I write this, it becomes more obvious to me that there is probably internal work we have to do before we can have the clarity we need to know where those boundaries land, and why. Somewhat related to this, I have also found it helpful to listen to my gut when I feel I might be about to overshare something – typically at work – and then wait a day or so to see how I feel about having said too much. As I’ve gotten older, I trust that intuition completely, because I know it’s telling me something and that, if I ignore it, I’ll regret it the next day!
I can’t think of an experience of a teacher that got too close or too friendly, although I probably did experience that at some point. As a meditation teacher, I will definitely establish some explicit boundaries from day 1; not just to make sure everyone is on the same page, but also because it may make it easier to address discomforts or misunderstandings later on. Not being too distant or too close really feels like a dance, and ideally it’s more on the teacher’s hands to notice how the student-teacher relationship unfolds while at the same time being relaxed in who we are.
Natalie, I really liked you paraphrased the paramitas and how they relate to your life. I found last week’s reading hard to get through but I will give it another chance. Thank you for sharing your perspective on these important teachings.
Kat, thanks for sharing your struggles with patience (also my most difficult paramita) and for reminding us of the Wisdom that is there, and how we can take refuge in knowing that. I can relate to how you feel about the political situation in the US right now. I think patience can also show up in giving ourselves time to know what to do that would be of benefit and not add fuel to the fire. This is very tricky when we see so much suffering and injustice around us. I hope I’m understanding your response, but apologies if I didn’t! Thank you again for sharing about your experience.
Rosie, I can learn from your take of Generosity – how you give regardless of your “sense of abundance”. I could be wrong, but I sensed Discipline in the way you show up for friends and family, even for strangers who may need food. I think we can be disciplined even if we are doing what we are called to do. Thank you for sharing.