Do you have questions about meditation practice?
July 23, 2014 | 27 Comments
This is me, awaiting your questions.
Please post in comments and I will do my best to offer you a helpful answer.
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27 Comments
How can I find a meditation teacher/guru for an intensive training or practice?
This is a great question. A meditation teacher and a guru are two different categories, however, at least in my mind. You can find a meditation teacher by visiting different practice centers, getting recommendations from friends, and doing research online. Reading books is always a great beginning. When you read a book that resonates with you, find out what lineage the writer practices in. Who was their teacher and where did they learn?
For finding a guru, you can begin in exactly the same way: follow the trail of writings and teachings that resonate with you. Practice in that lineage. See what kind of heart connection develops because the heart connection is the most important thing. It’s like falling in love. It may happen in a way you expect or it may not. I was reading this interview with the wonderful teacher Traleg Rinpoche and his insights are of course very worth contemplating.
Hope this helps!
What path do you recommend if you wish to become a teacher?
I recommend becoming an excellent student in the lineage of your choice. The path of becoming a teacher naturally unfolds from that. Hope this helps.
Sage advice. Thank you Susan.
Hi dear Susan. Once you said that boredoom is a good sign in the practice of meditation. Can you explain better? Thanks!
Yes! A great question, btw. We are so accustomed to processing an enormous amount of input every day. There is so much to take in. We have forgotten what it feels like to have an unoccupied mind. When faced with “nothing to do,” we may actually become nervous. It can be difficult to wait in line for five minutes without a cellphone to check or walk down the street without headphones. When we remove all of these inputs to just focus on the breath, our mind may try to introduce preoccupations in the form of daydreams, anxieties, and planning. When we become bored it is a sign we are letting go of all of this! Hope this helps.
Thanks Susan fo the answer. Well in the past I used to think boredoom was a bad sign! But now that you explain it makes sense. Now this leads to another question. Within practice does boredoom evolve into something more profound? Or boredoom is a permanent and normal state?
Thanks!
You’ll have to tell me! There is no one answer that suits everyone. Keep an eye on it and let me know.
Hello Susan,
During your last few months with the Open Heart Project annual membership, you talked about a meditation for feeding one’s inner demons. I cannot remember the name of teacher and book you recommended for this practice. I do remember it was a woman author who is well known for teaching this particular meditation. I hope you can help me find her again!
Happy to! “Feeding Your Demons” by Tsultrim Allione. It’s wonderful.
Hello Susan,
I am currently going through an extremely stressful time. I have recently had an interview with a very prestigious school – one that would definitely put me on a fast track to succeed in my chosen career path. I’ve been rejected so much over the past few years as a writer and now I really have a chance to make a change in my career. I meditate daily to try and keep my head on straight, but the stress is overwhelming – particularly the stress of not knowing what to do should I not get accepted to school. To make matters worse, I am now convinced that I am going to be rejected. My question for you is whether or not you know of any books that discuss how to deal with rejection through meditation, or if you have any meditation tips on dealing with such a daunting prospect.
Many thanks for any and all help. I love your site and specifically the open heart project. You’ve helped me through a lot and really made a difference in my life.
All my best,
Will
Hi Will. I’m glad you’ve found the open heart project useful. Many thanks for saying so.
The stress you describe sounds intense and difficult. It is great that you are meditating daily and I truly hope that is bringing benefit. (It tends to be most beneficial if you don’t expect it to “calm you down.”)
In addition to meditation, it is really good if you can do something physical like walk, garden, do yoga, or something like that. If possible.
In terms of dealing with rejection, I don’t know of anything specifically about that, but I can recommend Mingyur Rinpoche’s book, “Joyful Wisdom.” Also, he has videos about dealing with his own anxieties and panic attacks, here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dGQ2mxjkb2E
I hope this helps and I wish you the best! Susan
Can meditation help when a loved one will live far from us? The question may be stupid but I’ve been though a lot of suffering and sadness just to think this important person will change contry very soon.
I think meditation can help with emotions of all kinds, not be “deleting” them but by making them bearable–even under the sad circumstances of a loved one moving away.
Since I got my heart blown to smithereens by my former partner and lost my sense of self I feel the only way to have joy is to trust in our shared humanity and the goodness of others. Before I got real satisfaction, joy (real joy) and happiness through pursuing my own ends and having a strong sense of who I was and what I stood for. Now that all seems rather trivial. Its difficult because not having any relative ground beneath me or principles to hold onto I feel much more self doubt and I suffer much more but at the same time I feel more able to connect to a wide array of people. Is this a normal experience?
I don’t know anything about normal. But it sounds beautiful to me. Wishing you well and sending gratitude.
thanks very much susan. If I may ask another question, I was wondering whether you had any insight on the phrase “form is emptiness, emptiness is form”…. M
Hi,
This is Amit from Mumbai, India. I am a 37 year old male with a set of questions for you. Please take out time to answer them, as I cant think of any other “genuine” place which can answer my questions. I have done lot of research on these questions, but I found out that to every question there were multiple answers. Some said yes, some said no, some said maybe and so on. So basically I didn’t find any “Definite” answers and hence now my last hope is your site.
First, I tried “Watching the candle flame meditation”, and its really suiting me.
Now when I did research on it on the google, I found 2 ways to do it.
The first is “JUST” staring at the flame. And second is, doing different kinds of visualisations after staring at the flame.
Now my question is :-
ISNT STARING AT THE FLAME FOR 30-60-90 MINUTES ENOUGH???
CANT I SKIP THE VISUALISATION EXERCISES, AND JUST REMAIN WITH STARING AT THE FLAME ONLY.
I find visualisations very boring and just watching the candle flame super interesting to do.
Secondly, for the last 3-4 years I have been watching my breath regularly. I do 40 minutes of watching the breath meditation. Now I have started doing “Watching the candle flame meditation” in the evening for 40 minutes, 20 minutes at one time. I have lots of free time these days. So I enjoy a total of 70-80 minutes of these meditations everyday.
So my question is……….Is the combination of these two meditations “Ok” to practice everyday?? I don’t want to quit one of them because both are giving me super fantastic results.
Third & the last question. How many years should I practice watching the candle flame & watching the breath meditation??
Next two years?? Or five?? Or ten years?? Or is it ok to do it for the rest of my life??
That’s it. Wating very anxiously for your reply.
With lots & lots of love.
Amit Verma
37 yr old male.
Mumbai, India
Hello! Does mediation help with making very important decisions when one is really confused about what to do? Thanks 🙂
I think it can be helpful in that it can allow your mind to rest. A rested mind is more apt to give rise to insights. Wishing you well!
Hi Dear Suzan
I am a 41 years old man and I have started meditation a few weeks ago but I terribly afraid .
Because I had automatic yoga and also I am a medium .As I trust my emotion I stopped meditation for 5 days , but suddenly I have been meditated automatically. So I’m meditating sometimes for 10 minutes 3 times in a week .
My first question :if I stop it there is a danger to me ?
Secondly : If I continue it do you think there is a danger to me as a medium ? Or automatic yoga ?
Yours sincerely
Keyvan
Keyvan, hello. I strongly suggest that you work with a meditation instructor to continue your practice. I can’t offer any advice, unfortunately but I wish you well! If you live near a Shambhala Center, I can recommend that. shambhala.org
Hi Susan
Thanks your effort and kindness I am well but if I could find a scientific description for these I would be better .In my country there is no Shambaha center unfortunately.
And I learnt meditation with a Mantra ..I have spoken with my teacher unfortunately he couldn’t help me and said that he had not seen somebody like me ..my spontaneous is going faster and more violent ..During last week my hands were dancing exactly alike Indian dancers and yesterday I made an imaginary ball on front of my chest when my fingered touched each other I started shaking so hardly .
I appreciate you if you could give me a brief explanation to understand them .and I am serious to relinquish this power if it is possible
Again thank for your effort and kindness
Hello! This post couldn’t be written any better!Reading through this ost reminds me of my good old room mate!
He always kept chatting about this. I will forward this article to
him. Fairly certzin he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!
Hi
I have some questions about my meditation practice. I think it is helping me greatly in long run in my battle with anxiety. However, sometimes I have strong emotional reactions to the sessions. It feels like I’m too relaxed to the point when I feel dizzy right after a 20minutes session. Often feel like my head is spinning and I feel emotional. Is this common?