Do you have questions about meditation practice? I will try to answer them.
February 7, 2012 | 30 Comments
This is me*, awaiting your questions about meditation practice. Please post in comments and I will do my best to offer you a helpful answer.
*I have been a student of Shambhala Buddhism since 1995. I teach meditation workshops all over the world. I graduated from a Buddhist Seminary in 2004 and was authorized as a meditation instructor in 2005. I am the NY Times best selling author of 6 books. I started The Open Heart Project in 2011 in order to teach everyone on earth to meditate for 10 minutes per day. As of this morning, there are 3892 members, but who’s counting.
categorized in: meditation
30 Comments
This was something that came up for me last night, and I have thought through the answer for my own practice, but figured I’d mention it here in case it comes up for other people.
The question is, is using a guided meditation “cheating?” I often find that I can sit longer if I’m doing a guided meditation because I don’t feel so alone, but is it cheating because I’m not doing it all by my self?
Leanna, hi! According to Buddhist tradition, there are 3 units of measure for your practice and you can use any or all of them:
1. Time (Usually longer is better, but you never know)
2. Counting (as in mantras)
3. Realization (how much wisdom is accruing)
#1 is the easiest. #2 doesn’t apply in this case. #3 always applies.
This is a long-winded way of saying that whatever you feel is increasing your realization (as opposed to your time on the cushion) is to be pursued. That said, if Shamatha is your main practice, it’s good to stick with the technique.
If the purpose of the guided meditation is to guide you to a more peaceful place through visualizing or imagining, then it is not Shamatha. But if it you find that this is what serves you best, by all means go for it. Make it your main practice.
In either case, learn one practice thoroughly. Develop a relationship with it. Like all relationships, there will be good days and bad. And like all relationships, over time you’ll see more deeply into what is really, really going on. At the point where you feel stable in your practice, you could then tinker gently with its edges by sometimes doing other practices as you deem necessary. But when in doubt, stick to one road.
I realize this answer is a little all over the place, but hopefully some or all of it spoke to what you were looking for!! Let me know. xo S
Thanks, they aren’t guided meditations like “imagine you are on a boat floating down a stream” they are more the videos you do where you give instruction in the beginning, or some others where every so often the person will give a reminder to return to the breath. I did find with some other guided meditations where there was more talking about the technique throughout the time, it actually made me concentrate less so I decided those were not more helpful even though I was sitting for longer.
I don’t quite know what my main practice is yet. What ever practice I am doing that day, I do fully, and most days it is Shamatha. But I’m not ready to commit at this point.
This is not cheating!!! Totally not. It is really, really helpful to receive the instruction while practicing.
Could you please address the eyes-closed vs eyes-open debate and give feedback on what is recommended?
Thanks for your help Susan! Keep up the great work!!!
Tanya
Thanks, Tanya. Happy to speak to this. And, for those who hate to read, here is a video in response to this question: http://vimeo.com/21017031
Both kinds (eyes closed and eyes opened) are fine. What is important is to choose a technique and practice it with some precision. For me, this is why I suggest an eyes-opened practice:
1. When our eyes are closed, we tend to fall asleep
2. When eyes are closed, it is easier to space out in a certain way
3. Eyes-closed practice can have more of a sense of retreat and, after it is over “coming back”
4. Eyes-open practice is more a practice of wakefulness, of being right here
5. With eyes-open practice, there is less of a transition from the meditation experience to the post-meditation experience.
Now if your eyes become irritated by leaving them open, you could take your contacts out and see if that helps. Also, as you practice longer, the irritation will lessen–your eyes will adjust.
If you feel that leaving the yes open create distractions, label those distractions “thinking” and come back to the breath. They too will lessen as your meditation sessions lengthen and deepen.
Please let me know if this helps.
Thanks, S
Hi Susan!
I’m trying to meditate, but I’m so distracted! I keep having thoughts/pictures drift in and I have to tell myself to focus. When I focus on my breathing, it seems like I’m “fighting” my body. Instead of settling down, my breathing becomes more stressed. If I do settle down, I find that I fall asleep (I’m lying down because of pain from an injury to my lumbar area). Any suggestions?
Thanks!
Rick
Hi Rick. Thanks for the question. Now, a question for you: how long are you meditating in an individual session? Is it for 10 or so minutes, usually? I ask because sometimes it can take more time than that for us to settle into our practice–often around 20 minutes. At this point, things like stressed breathing and a sense of fighting your body may settle down on their own. So, if you are able to, try a longer sit every now and then.
In the meantime, when you feel you are fighting your body, please try labeling that “thinking” and coming back to your breath. Each time you are distracted by the idea and reality of this fight, label, let go, and come back–with gentleness toward yourself.
There is no problem with thoughts/pictures drifting in to your practice. Of course they do. Your mind doesn’t cease operating in its normal capacity when you are on the cushion and there is no need to try to quell such thoughts/pictures. Instead, we take a different relationship to them. Simply allow them. When you are able to remain gently focused on your breath, that is great. When you are unable to remain gently focused on your breath, that is great too–because at some point, you have noticed that this is the case. Then gently come back again to your breath. It is the noticing, NOT the unbroken focus that we’re after here.
Often when we practice, the thing that most needs our attention comes to the fore. For most of us, that means we fall asleep!! We are just so, so tired. As you relax in your practice, your fatigue makes itself felt. So of course you fall asleep. Again, over time, this will happen less and less.
Are you saying that you practice lying down because of lumbar injury? If so, of course you’re falling asleep. I would be too. If pain prevents you from practicing in a seated posture, don’t worry. Falling asleep will happen less and less, as mentioned. But if you are able to find an upright seated posture, even leaning against something and/or super-supported by pillows, that would be a good thing to try. BUT DON’T HURT YOURSELF! This is the most important of all.
I hope this helps. Do let me know. Warmly, Susan
Susan,
Thank you for the reply! I will try your suggestions and let you know how I fare.
Sincerely,
Rick
Hi Susan
my question is in regard to the “pointing out” instruction,
the term comes up every now and then, and I was wondering
if it is a specific time in your practice that it happens between the teacher and the student. Or is it Abhisheka or something that a student has to request.
I’m involved in a tradition that has little direct contact with the principle teacher.
thank you!
Hi chris. Pointing out instruction is a very interesting and important topic. I have two answers:
1. It is a specific event between your teacher and you. You can request it and/or it could–and does–just happen. Sometimes it is part of a particular Abhisheka or Samaya vow. I would also venture to say that it IS Abhisheka and Samaya itself. So this is a very personal thing between yourself and your teacher, with whom you can relate in any and all of the kayas–dharma, sambhoga, and nirmana…
Thus I have heard.
2. If you define pointing out instruction as anything or anyone that shows you the nature of mind, then it is happening all the time. I find that the closer my connection to my teacher (whether or not I actually see him in the flesh), the more I am aware of this.
Please let me know if this is of use. It is a very important question and I truly hope to offer something beneficial.
Your fellow practitioner, Susan
Thank you Susan
I am assuming this is done with a Rinpoche or Roshi
and not a Acharya or instructor. I’m just wondering about this because
I have been regularly practicing and studying and it has never been discussed clearly
at least with my fog of a mind
thanks
chris
Ha! Fog of a mind, indeed. Yes, I think that pointing out of this kind is with Rinpoche or Roshi. But I am by no means an expert.
Keep me posted.
Hi Susan,
My first taste of shamatha / vispashyana meditation was a long time ago. The value of it is completely self-evident. Yet I refuse to do it; drumming up will-power to simply do it amplifies the defiant resistance, really to the point of tooth-gritting rebellion. Whence this craziness, and how to subvert it without engaging in this conceit of a divided self? I see the stupidity of the situation and of even bothering to express it, yet that’s the conundrum I’m in. Is this just one of the hundreds of ways that fear of emptiness manifests? What to cultivate / think to get past it?
Cheers….!
Hi Nell. We all have such resistance!! I definitely do!! The only choice is to bring the resistance with you. At some point, we just have to sit down and do it. As your resistance arises, label it “thinking” and come back to the breath.
OR. You could make your resistance itself the object of your meditation. In other words, sit on your meditation cushion or chair and place your attention on your resistance. Really feel it. Turn toward it. Experience it. If your attention strays (including into how stupid you think it is and how frustrating and so on), come back to the resistance itself–not the story of it, but the feeling of it. Try to do that for 5 minutes.
In any and all cases, the first step is to give up trying to get past it. Completely.
Let me know what you think! xo S
Hi Susan, I was wondering if you could please talk a bit more about the importance of practicing consistently at the same time every day. Why is this important? If we practice every day but at different times, is this less effective? Is it more important to practice every day or to practice every day at the same time?
Also, is it important to simply practice one technique? Mostly, my practice focusses on mindfulness of the breath but I really enjoy loving-kindness meditation so sometimes I do that instead – work on cultivating loving-kindness during my meditation, rather than simply being mindful of the breath. Is this not recommended?
Thank you,
Kate
The most important thing is to practice and it doesn’t HAVE to be at the same time every day. It is recommended simply because it helps most people develop the habit of meditation. It has nothing to do with effectiveness.
I wouldn’t call mindfulness and loving-kindness two separate techniques. Loving-kindness is usually bookended by a few minutes of mindfulness practice, so they are most often practiced together. It is up to you on any given day whether you prefer to practice only mindfulness or mindfulness + loving-kindness.
Does this help? Let me know! S.
Thank you Susan, this does help! I’m struggling generally with a lack of routine at the moment and so trying to find time to do anything at the same time every day is hard. I have been fighting it for a while but have recently started trying to accept this and move with the ‘flow’ of any given day, rather than trying to force a routine that I will inevitably fail at. Aiming for meditation every day for at least 5 minutes is far more achievable than aiming to sit down at the same time every day. I’m glad that still counts.
It’s also useful that mindfulness and loving-kindness can be considered the same technique. I am often confused as to whether the mindfulness practice is its own practice that is not defined by the focus of the mindfulness, or whether each focus constitutes its own technique. Sometimes I find it helpful to be mindful of strong emotions or visions or sensations that might come up during practice, sometimes I stay with the breath, sometimes I cultivate loving-kindness. It works for me this way, but I wondered whether I was ‘corrupting’ meditation by being so variable. Is that so?
Thank you for your help and guidance, Susan. I am so thrilled to have discovered the Open Heart Project!
With metta,
Kate
Glad to be practicing together, Kate!
Hi Susan.
As a fairly novice meditator I am really enjoying meditating with you (almost) every day. My question is why do we put our hands palms down? In the past I have been encouraged to hold them in a bowl shape or in chin mudra.
Thanks,
Victoria
Hi Victoria. The suggested placement for the hands is palms-down because this is simply the easiest, most restful place for them.
The basic idea with Shamatha is to keep all details to their simplest, most minimal iteration.
Bowl shape is also fine–for some people this is more restful. Chin Mudra is used in other practices but not in Shamatha. I’m not sure why.
Hope this helps! Susan
Hi Susan, thank you so much for your work. After trying for something like a year, I have finally established a rather steady practice of 15 minutes a day and I enjoy it very much. My question is that when I sit, sometimes I’m with the breath, and sometimes I find myself having some kind of insight, like oh my thoughts are all so fearbased, but to be aware of that, isn’t that thinking? The sometimes ‘insights’ have been very helpful to me, so I would like to be open to seeing things like that, but I don’t want to sit and think, or for the meditation be like therapy, it just kind of happens naturally sometimes. It feels like such a helpful thing to see, so I get confused about how much to follow it, or whether to instantly let it go and go back to the breath. Or is it just natural for the meditation to be a mix of all of that?
Thanks,
Sidsel
Sidsel, this is such a good question.
I think there is a difference between discursiveness and insight. Still, when either arises during meditation, the instruction is to touch them with your attention and gently let them go. This doesn’t mean to disregard the nature of the insight. As you say, they are very helpful. Feel what it feels like to have this insight. Really take it in. Then watch as it dissolves on its own. Meditation is a mix of all that…
Hope this is useful. Please let me know! S.
thanks Susan, it’s very useful, I will try this.
Hi Susan! I have another question! Given your deep work with the enneagram, I’m wondering if you could weigh in on whether different enneagram types encounter different experiences/challenges with meditation practice. So curious to hear whether “always thinking 5s” (me!) might have a different approach to meditation than a more outgoing 7, for example. Can’t wait to hear your thoughts. Thank you for all you’re doing (I particularly loved today’s confidence post, by the way; have already forwarded it to a few friends). xo
Hi Laura. Love questions about the enneagram!! Thank you.
I’m not really sure how the different types work with the challenges of meditation, although I can imagine that all of the mental types (5, 6, 7) have a relationship to thought that is different for the gut and heart types. Perhaps 5s are more naturally absorbed by their thoughts while 7s want to be entertained by the experience of meditation. But really, I have no idea. (Although this is a fascinating question…)
What I’d say is that perhaps the more you practice, the more you will run the spectrum of your own passion and virtue (in your case, avarice and non-attachment). The spectrum itself comes alive and begins to ripen, as do your lines of integration (at 8) and distintegration (at 7). Meditation puts your own particular path into play–which is a great challenge and a great relief.
I’m going to ask a couple of friends who are also meditation instructors and enneagram “enthusiasts” (that word is just too weak) to weight in… Will keep you posted! Thanks again for the great questions. xo S
Thanks Susan…I appreciate how thoughtful–and thought-provoking–your answers always are. Have a lovely weekend!
You too, Laura.
Hello Susan,
I am practicing meditation for about 10 days and I have a sensation I am not sure about. I feel a form of energy flowing around my stomach and head, sometimes weaker, sometimes stronger. When I am aware of this energy I don’t feel pain or anything else but also I cannot concentrate on my breath. My question is, should I accept it for wht it is, make it the focus of my meditation or try to ignore it?
Thanks!
Gina, it is up to you but my suggestion is that you label that sensation “thinking”, gently let it go and return to the breath. When or if it re-arises, repeat. Does this make sense? Let me know. Best, S