Tonglen Instruction
Sit comfortably in a quiet place.
Relax for a few moments by following your breath in and then
out for a few cycles. Just breathe in and breathe out.
Begin with a flash of open awareness. For a moment, drop all
thought and just open up.
Bring to mind the feeling of pain. Let yourself feel its
qualities: perhaps it is speedy, hot, claustrophobic. (Or whichever words
better describe your sensations). Breathe in the feeling of that pain.
Next, breathe out the opposite: in this case, the qualities
of relaed, cool, spacious.
Now bring to mind whatever situation is causing you pain, in
this case the pain that results when a close relationship ends. Really connect
with the feelings and breathe in speedy, hot, claustrophobic. Breathe out
relaxed, cool, spacious.
When youÕve established a clear connection to your feelings
and think youÕve pretty much stopped avoiding or suppressing your feelings and
instead are allowing them, begin to extend out to all beings who have ever
experienced what you are going through: the end of a relationship.
Breathe in their pain, speedy, hot, claustrophobic. On the
exhalation, send out relaxed, cool, spacious.
Try to do this for a few minutes or as long as you like.
When youÕre ready to stop, just let the practice go and sit quietly for a few
moments before getting up.
Tonglen Resources:
Article: Alice Walker & Pema Chodron in Conversation
(Shambhala Sun) http://www.shambhalasun.com/index.php?option=content&task=view&id=1929
Article: Tonglen: Exchanging Self
for Others (The Meditation Spot)
http://www.aboutmeditation.com/tonglen.html
Book: The Wisdom of No Escape by
Pema Chodron http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1570628726/meditationspo-20
Book: How to Practice: The Way to
a Meaningful Life by the Dalai Lama http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0743453360/meditationspo-20